William World News William F. Yurasko's blog v.14 – Nats, Redskins, Capitals, D.C. life, transportation, not so much Penn State anymore,

SAN DIEGO — Rep. Heath Shuler (D, NC) and Chargers coach Norv Turner were arrested after an alleged assault of an area man.
Eyewitness video of the alleged assault show Shuler and Turner wailing on the thirysomething year old man on the side of a popular jogging trail. According the video, Turner could be heard [...]

TIJUANA — Speedy Gonzales, the “fastest mouse in Mexico” and star of Warner Bros. cartoons in the 1960s has died in a Tijuana methadone clinic where he had been seeking treatment for heroin addiction. News of his death was released by his cousin, Slow Poke Rodriguez.
Gonzales, 56, was a regular in Warner Bros. cartoons staring [...]

UNIVERSITY PARK — In a development that has sent shockwaves through the beer industry and the Penn State campus, a Penn State Ph.D. candidate in chemistry has determined that Yuengling and Rolling Rock beers are exactly the same.
“The findings are surprisingly conclusive and have a margin of error of less than 0.005%,” said Maximillian Schlorndorf. [...]

WASHINGTON, D.C. — The National Dairy Council announced this morning that Dan Steinberg, author DC Sports Bog, will be joining their team. In his new role, Steinberg will write the council’s first blog, CHEESE BOY.
“I cannot not emphasize just how happy I am to quit the Bog and start blogging about improtant, like cheese,” said [...]

ARLINGTON, Va.— It seems like every year on April 1 my apartment complex starts filling up the swimming pool. It winds up being a cruel tease on days like Wednesday (high 80+) of course, because it will not open until Memorial Day weekend. April fools!