Beano Watch 07.29.2009

After a long hiatus, ESPN football commentator Carroll H. Cook (’54 Pitt) returned for a chat. His comments about Penn State are highlighted.

Ed (PA): Cookin’ with Beano!! The old man in State College seems to have some added jump in his step since getting the hip replaced. Recruiting is up, the wins are up… Any chance you see PSU winning or playing for a national championship before Joe decided to hang them up?

Beano: Penn State could play for the national title this year because of an easy non-conference schedule and a favorable league schedule, compared with the Big 12, ACC and Pac-10. Non-conference games are Akron, Syracuse, Temple, Eastern Illinois — not exactly an SEC schedule, is it? So the answer is yes, the Nittany Lions could play for the national title this season. Remember, Iowa knocked Penn State off last season or we could have seen Paterno and company playing for the title a year ago.

Before you have heart palpitations, keep in mind that Beano merely said that Penn State could compete for the national title. He then brings up a painful memory. Jerk.

Tommy (Lion fan): What did you think of Penn State being named best party school in America?

Beano Cook: When I was an undergraduate and visiting two friends, I thought it was a good party school then. Maybe they redshirted a few party kids last year to be number one this year. Some of the best college parties I went to were at the Phi Delt house.

Beano offers very little, other than the information that Penn State knew how to party back when the world was still in black and white. Frankly, the #1 party school ranking is not something to hang your hat on when it is strongly based on things like “lots of beer” when the beer is at best, Yuengling, but often Natty and Beast, respectively, and “Major Frat and Sorority Scene” just means people like buying their friends. I had a good time there though, despite these things, I promise!

Now, something that is not Penn State related:

WFY (BeltwayLand): We’re still waiting for “Haven’t They Suffered Enough: The Autobiography of Carroll H. Cook.” When will our patience be rewarded?

Beano Cook: I am working on a book. Four chapters are done. We are looking for a publisher. Very good.

I’m hoping one of the chapters reveals that he and George Paterno used to go trolling for babes on bowl game trips or something.

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